All my life has been marked by periods of waiting. When I was younger, I remember that I couldn’t wait until I was in Youth Group at my church. Youth Group was a magical club filled with the most awesome kids who I wanted to be just like. Once I arrived, I would obviously have to rock Aeropostale (it was still cool back then) and would be able to wear makeup! I would have finally ~arrived~ and would basically become an adult as soon and I had the cool title of “teen.” Life would be perfect- if I could just… get… to 13 years old. And then it happened. I was in Youth Group. I was a teen. I was…mature! Yeah. Because obviously teens are super mature, right? Wrong. I mean.... Have you ever SEEN a teen? You know the girls that travel in packs in the mall with their faces down in their phones, bumping into you as you wander around Forever 21 trying to find just a simple t-shirt? WHY DOESN’T FOREVER 21 HAVE SIMPLE T-SHIRTS????? I digress. Where were we? Oh yes, we were talking about waiting. Well once my awkward self had settled into her teenage years and begun the joyous trek of self-loathing and boy-craziness, I began to start another period of waiting. College. If I could only get to college. I would do just as my parents had done and marry someone straight out of college. I would probably meet him my freshman year, dazzle him enough to convince him to buy me a diamond by junior year, and be finishing up my wedding preparations by my second semester of senior year. The wedding would probably happen about 2 months after graduation, just to give me enough time to spend with my family and then off I would go with Prince Charming into a lovely ~perfect~ life with no worries. And that’s exactly how it happened! Oh wait no… this is my life, not a Disney movie. Yes I went to college. Yes I met some nice boys. No I did not dazzle any of them enough to marry me. No, I was not planning my wedding senior year (okay I have been planning my wedding on Pinterest for about 5 years but that DOESN’T COUNT). No I am not in wedded bliss as I type. I’m at my childhood home in Delaware. I’m dating a really cool guy. I’m paying student loans. I’m figuring out my future. I’m again, waiting. Here I am again, finding myself going back to the same mindset of “if this and this could just happen, life is going to be PERFECT. All I need is for God to line up these last couple of things and I will be set for life!” But… my life didn’t become perfect when I turned 13 and got into Youth Group. My life didn’t become perfect when I went to college. And my life won’t become perfect when I get engaged or married or land my dream job or start my family or retire with my millions. (That’s a joke) Stop waiting for everything to fall in place. If you are anything like me, you expect that whatever you are waiting on is going to make your life perfect. But it won’t. Life is not perfect. Now as I sit here with my darling cat curled up at my feet, life is pretty good. So let’s enjoy the small moments that we have day to day with the ones we love, instead of putting all our hope and joy into an earthly future that is not certain. My Grandma says, “life is daily”, and that has always stuck in the back of my mind. Enjoy the life that God has given you right where you are, right now. Proverbs 16:9 The mind of man plans his way, But the LORD directs his steps. Me as a ~very cool and mature teen~.
1 Comment
|
|